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Something Like a Review – The Chosen by John G. Hartness

August 28, 2016 Leave a comment

Disclosure: I know the author personally. I purchased this book with my own Audible credit because I wanted to read it. This post is simply a reflection of my desire to share a piece of fiction I enjoyed from an author I choose to support.

John is one of the best marketers I’ve ever seen in action. If you’ve seen him at a con, you know what I mean. No panel is complete without his signature “buy our shit” proclamation, and if you’ve never witnessed his epic readings replete with Sasquatch dick jokes, you’re missing out. So when he promoted “The Chosen” as “the book that got me fired from one of my jobs for blasphemy,” I knew I had to read it.

In true John style, “The Chosen” is an irreverent and humorous poke at things people take “super cereal.” He introduces us to an Adam and Eve (yes, THAT Adam and Eve) that will send the devout for their rosaries, an angel that will make you question both your definition and affiliation with good/evil and an unforgettable motley crew as they set off on a road trip to save the world.

One of the things I loved most about this book, and I did love it, was the knowledgeable and respectful ways religious belief was handled. And warped. I listened to this as an audiobook, but I’ll be getting my hands on a copy of “The Chosen” to see how the hell he managed to have his characters refute the creation story in a way that 1.) makes sense, 2.) was amusing, and 3.) respected the essence of the story. While I’m not religious, I could tell that Hartness is knowledgeable about the material, respects those who believe it, and yet finds ways of cutting through the poetic language and creating a plausible story.

So, if he’s so respectful, why might he have been fired for blasphemy? Well, let’s just say that after millennia of walking the Earth after their expulsion from the garden, Adam and Eve aren’t exactly what the faithful may expect. But after all they’ve witnessed, I can’t say that I blame them for the way they change. Character development, yo. Even though it’s not what many would approve of, the changes to their characters feels genuine, as if they really are people who’ve lived tens of thousands of years, witnessed some of the greatest tragedies of history, experienced their own personal tragedies and yet, still manage to function in our crazy world. Theirs is a creation story I want to believe, and the choices at the end are believable and fulfilling.

And what are those choices? Well, that’s what you’ll need to find out. Suffice to say that there’s a Pandora’s box feeling to the tone at the end (and if you know your mythology, you’ll know what I mean). I read this and was able to put all the recent tragedies and horrific occurrences aside for a little while.

Pick up this book – however you choose to ingest it, and read it. If you’re super sensitive about religion, this isn’t the book for you, but if you’re willing to have an open mind and enjoy a well-written piece of fiction with a religious (though not proselytizing) bent to it, this is the one I’d recommend.

Medium: Audiobook from Audible.com

Other: Available in various formats from Amazon.com

Overall rating: 5 stars

Potential re-read: Definitely, especially to figure out how the hell did did what he did.

Dead-tree worthy?: Yes. You’ll find your own reasons, I’m sure, but from this writer, my purchase is motivated by the need to figure out how the hell did did what he did.

Something Like a Review – Year One: A Quincy Harker, Demon Hunter Collection by John G. Hartness

Disclosure: I know the author personally. I purchased this book with my own Audible credit because I wanted to read it. This post is simply a reflection of my desire to share a piece of fiction I enjoyed from an author I choose to support.

One of the benefits of connecting with local writers is getting an opportunity to meet interesting people and discover stories you might not have found otherwise. Buying books becomes an act of shopping small, and when you find something you love, sharing that love promotes and supports people you know and care about.

I discovered John’s work after encountering him at ConCarolinas. And, yes, “encounter” is the correct verb. Though I was slow on the uptake, I did become hooked on Bubba and was curious about his other writing. His pitch for Quincy Harker snared me: “Mina Murray and Jonathan Harker had a son. They named him Quincy. His guardian angel calls him Q. Dracula calls him nephew.” Given my love for things horror, and his sense of humor, I was sold.

If I could imagine a figure from classic horror coming to live in Charlotte, North Carolina, Quincy and Uncle Luke (aka – Dracula, to the rest of us) would be the perfect fit. There’s plenty of culture to suit an old vamp like Luke, and enough to keep Quincy and Charlotte-Mecklenberg police officer Rebecca Flynn busy for a long time. And that’s before we through Federal Agent John Smith into the mix.

I already knew Hartness is adept at blending horror and humor, but in the Quincy Harker novellas, he skillfully tilts the scale away from the humor while still retaining snark to keep you snorting through Quincy’s one-liners. This series is darker, and deeper than the Bubba stories, but showcases John’s potential for range. His writing style is cinematic, and breathes life into the mundane that has me looking over my shoulder whenever I go through parts of Charlotte that show up in the novellas. This is one of those series that you can just imagine Netflix or Amazon Studios picking this up and making a series out of it. So, how ’bout it, guys? #HarkerTV Hells, yeah.

In the end, this is a series that should not be missed. The voice talent on the audiobook does a great job with all the characters, but especially Quincy. He’s the voice I hear in my head when I imagine this badass Demon Hunter. You can buy the individual novellas, but really, you’re going to want them all, so go for the compendium. It’s worth every cent.

 

Medium: Audiobook from Audible.com

Other: Available in various formats from Amazon.com

Overall rating: 5 stars

Potential re-read: Yes, especially as the other novellas/collections are released.

Dead-tree worthy?: Probably, but I liked the audiobook so much that I probably will stick with that.

Something Like a Review – Scattered, Smothered, and Chunked: Bubba the Monster Hunter, Season 1 by John G. Hartness

February 11, 2016 1 comment

Disclosure: I know the author personally, but I don’t hold that against him when it comes to reading his work. 🙂 Even though I do know this guy, I purchased this book with my own Audible credit because I wanted to read it. This post is simply a reflection of my desire to share a piece of fiction I enjoyed from an author I choose to support.

Even with all that out of the way, I still have a bit of a story to tell. I am not a new-comer to the Bubba legacy. In fact, I learned about Bubba the Monster Hunter several years ago at ConCarolinas. John is one hell of a panelist and storyteller and hearing him talk about this “new” series was enough to get me out to author alley to buy an author-graphed copy. 

That was…something like 2012 or 2013.

Like I said, not a new-comer.

But, school happened, and time evaporated. I still attended cons and every time I caught him on (or crashing) a panel, his comments about his Bubba stories intrigued the hell out of me. When he announced the collection’s release as an audiobook, I finally sprang at it because I knew I could work that in to my crazy schedule. Until my iPod died. But that’s another story. Fast forward to last month, and finally, FINALLY, the stars aligned properly. I queued up Bubba and his redneck hijinks, and let me tell you, it was worth every sarcastic, irreverent second.

There is a fine balance between using evocative language and detail to bring a place to life for a person who’s never visited it and creating hyperbolic clichés. While I don’t consider myself an initiate in the Southern Gothic tradition, or even the Southern culture, living here for 15 years has introduced me to where the line is and how easy it is to lumber over it, even with the best of intentions. Hartness, however, uses a deft hand with language and detail to bring that humid Southern air into his stories without actually suffocating readers with farcical descriptions. That’s not to say that this shit isn’t funny as hell – or that Bubba doesn’t have “authentic” redneck qualities and characteristics. I giggled my ass off throughout the collection of stories. Bubba has a distinctive voice and personality all his own and is unabashedly, unapologetically a Georgia good ol’ boy, albeit with a few upgrades and refinements. Not to mention a serious calling to kick monster ass. His friends and family, like Skeeter and Agent Amy, are equally vibrant and create a story world you just want to hang around in, even if it means occasionally getting covered in exploded glittery fairy guts.

Hartness takes on some of the best monsters around – zombies, vampires, goblins, werewolves and even Bigfoot – and manages to bring something new to each. Then, he takes on some of the less expected evils – like cupids. You never get bored with a re-hash of a monster trope on Bubba’s watch because they’re all a little different than what you expect. Funnier, too.

One of the great things about this collection is that it is a collection. All of the stories in this book are both stand-alone novellas (available digitally), yet create an on-going narrative when read together. There are throwback references to other stories, especially as the characters develop a history with each other and the reader, yet each story stands on its own merit. Since Hartness releases stories about once a month or so, readers get a quick fix instead of having to wait for the bundled collection. The one minor drawback to this approach, however, is some of the repeated details that you encounter – like Bubba’s description, or being re-introduced to Bertha, his .50 Desert Eagle pistol. Taken as individual stories, these details are entertaining and helpful to re-orient the reader, but as a collection, even a different presentation in each story made me itch to get past it so I could get to the good stuff.

Since I listened to this as an audiobook, I had the added dimension of the voice talent to layer on top of already fun and engaging stories. By far, this collection hosts one of my favorite combinations between story and voice talent. The combination of Bubba and his cast of cohorts and rivals and the way Andrew McFerrin brings it to life is perfect. The only frustration I have is that I have to wait for another audiobook collection. It’s a first world problem, I know, especially since all the novellas are available digitally on John’s site and on Amazon, but I think I’m hooked to the auditory experience for this one. I’ll read the novellas to get me through, but I’ll definitely grab the next audiobook collection.

In a way, I’m glad I waited to get the audiobook as my first Bubba experience, but now that I know what I’ve been missing, I’m eager to get caught up and stay that way. I’m proud to say I’m a Bubba fan.

Medium: Audiobook from Audible.com

Other: Available digitally on John’s site, and in various formats from Amazon.com

Overall rating: 5 stars

Potential re-read: Yes. Definitely.

Dead-tree worthy?: I have been staring at this question for a long time and wrestling with an answer. It’s not a reflection on the work, but on a question of preference. Can I imagine pulling this book off my shelf just to re-read the cupid story? Yup. But then again, it wouldn’t have that same…ambiance of the voice talent. I think the best answer I can give is YMMV. I think I’d prefer to keep this as an audiobook because my introduction to Bubba was an experience, and I’d hate to lose a part of that for the sake of shelf convenience.

Something Like a Review – How to Survive a Horror Movie by Seth Grahame-Smith

“Welcome to the Terrorverse!”

Quirk Books and Seth Grahame-Smith have done it again. Another book of theirs has won my heart. In Danse Macabre, Stephen King speaks of the fine line between horror and humor…this book manipulates the line in an undeniably fun way for a fan of the genre. This book takes the reader’s hand and helps them determine a.) if they’re in a horror movie, b.) what kind of horror movie they’re in (and whether its a sequel or not), and c.) the best way to survive it. Grahame-Smith pokes fun at the beloved tropes of the genre in a way that manages to somehow still remain respectful of everything that has come before.  He tackles the how-to’s that anyone trapped in the Terrorverse will need to know, like how to kill a zombie, vampire and includes information like “what to do if there are snakes on your plane.”

This is not a new book, but one I happened to stumble across as I was looking for another of his, and had I read it first, I probably would have been sucked in to his brand of humor and storytelling a lot sooner. As it stands, it has just made me a bigger fan, hungry to see what’s coming next.

I listened to this one as an audiobook on the way to work, and I giggled all the way. I don’t think this book is going to be appreciated by those who aren’t fans of the genre, but for someone who likes to watch slasher flicks like Friday the 13th while wrapping Christmas presents (well, it does have red and green in it – it’s seasonal!) and isn’t terribly serious about the artistic and intellectual merits of the genre, this would certainly tickle them and may even be a resource. Don’t be terribly surprised if they look at you in horror after reading page 15, though.

“Someone gave it to me as a gift.” Yikes. Getting a book called How to Survive a Horror Movie as a gift. That’s like getting a young Liz Taylor How to Survive a Divorce. “Oh, I just thought it’d make a nice gift, Liz. I’m sure you’ll never need it.”

If they read further and start to conduct recon and amass an arsenal, you’d better stick with them. They are the one with the book, after all, and they might be able to help you survive the 21 hours of night in a horror movie. 😉

If you’d like a taste of what’s inside, or if you think that even a mention of this book in your world may indicate that you are, in fact, in a horror movie, there’s a YouTube channel for the webseries spawned by this book. It may keep you alive long enough for the book to show up at your door. Maybe. If you pay attention.

As an added bonus, I found a great review on Goodreads that was written in the spirit of the book and made me laugh as hard as the book. Take a look and I hope you enjoy as much as I did.

Medium: audiobook from Audible.com

Other: other formats available from Amazon.com

Overall rating: 5 stars

Potential re-read: Yes, but not for everyone. For me, this is going to be one of those things I pick up when I need something of a reminder about why I love the spook factor in scary books and movies. After you read/watch enough, you can become immune to the chills or numb to the tactics. Sometimes, you just sit and critique it. I’m pretty sure this book will appease the inner grump when those moments happen and remind me of why I love it so much.

Dead tree worthy?: Yes, but not for everyone. For this to be worth the space on the shelf, you’ve got to have a love for horror movies, horror stories, and have a sense of humor, especially about the things you love. This is a rare combination, but a magic one. For the average reader, this would probably be a fun novelty, but not one that would inspire the removal of green or plastique from the wallet to procure it. The audiobook version is fun and light-hearted, though you miss out on the format of the text and the illustrations.

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